In Proverbs, there are two pitfalls for the Simple.
One is the companionship of fools (see 1:8ff). The other is the adulteress and
the temptation to sexual sin. There is no other place in the contemporary
church where Satan has done more damage. Many in Christianity see the Enemy
behind every circumstance of life yet fail to see him when he is the elephant
in the living room 
of our sexuality. He skulks
around behind our hypocritical piety and our curious silence and attacks at
will. He lies in wait for our children. He uses our guilt to keep us from
arming our children.
When this subject is approached, real compassion must
be shown. The men and women in the pews have had their share of guilty sexual
experiences. 43% of women have had an 
abortion by the time they reach
age 45. Couples have divorced and remarried. Just behind the headlines of your
local paper is the news of a definite medical link between cervical cancer and
promiscuity. Sex before marriage has often lit the emotional fuse that blew
marriages apart a decade later. Pornography has escaped its brown paper wrapper
and slipped inside the defense of our homes through a cable to our television
or computer screens. The result is a loss of emotional attachment, potential
intimacy, and sexual satisfaction.
Satan dances under the guise of political correctness.
The virtue of sexual freedom has replaced the virtue of sexual purity. Society, through its attitudes as well as its entertainment, fans the flame of passion while hiding its underbelly of guilt, pain, disease, and death. One caught in the trap of homosexuality is told to fight for and demand of his sin and the possibility of escape is unknown to him. Satan offers sin for a season in one hand, while hiding the consequences of sin behind his back.
Society has no condom for the soul. They continue to seek medical answers for AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases. They enlist psychologists to deaden the pangs of guilt and prescribe the way out of depression. They proudly rally at the banner of sexual autonomy and then raise money to fund a way out of the consequences. Research is currently being done to help the promiscuous meadow vole stay at home. Scientists have injected a "Faithfulness" gene directly into his brain which has helped him to remain monogamous. Science and medicine have the key for everything. Morality is based in genetics. Man is free to choose his own destiny yet responds only to his instincts. He may get what he wants but he may not want what he gets.
Humanism, the wisdom of self-centered man, is particularly at fault. Their writings explain their evil in educated words:
"In the area of sexuality, we believe that intolerant attitudes, often cultivated by orthodox religions and puritanical cultures, unduly repress sexual conduct...short of harming others or compelling them to do likewise, individuals should be permitted to express their sexual proclivities and pursue their lifestyles as they desire" (Humanist Manifesto Il).
Do you see what they are saying? To the one who has been promiscuous and feels real guilt, or wrestles with the very consequences of their advice, they offer no consolation. You can't heal what, in your worldview, is not broken. Thousands walk the shadows in pain because they cannot acknowledge their sin and so they cannot be healed. The church must offer the mercy of God to all. Forgiveness, cleansing, grace, and healing are available.
The church has a second responsibility. It is to the next generation. We must be honest about our own failures and the consequences of our sin, individually and corporately. There is a radical difference between knowing a moral standard and falling short of it and not knowing what the moral standard is. It is the church's responsibility to uphold the moral standard so that the entrapments of Satan are avoided. If our children are not taught, they will walk into the destruction and judgment with head held high.
I. A Father's Plea (5:1-2)
In the midst of a sexually charged culture, a responsible parent begs his child to listen well, to "maintain discretion." All too early, the child must have the weapons to hold the ground given him by God. Wisdom is not a one-time attainment. It must be habitually cultivated to be preserved. He must maintain it with the tenacity of an army in the field. Solomon's Song of Love has the continual refrain: "Do not arouse or awaken love; until it so desires" (Song of Solomon 2: 7; 3:5; 8:4). Pure passion has its proper time.
There are things his son doesn't know that he doesn't know. The simple cannot predict the future. He cannot see the consequences of a course of action, The father and mother have a responsibility to let the son know where the pitfalls are. Especially in the area of sex, he is becoming old enough to make decisions that cannot be reversed. You cannot give up your virginity and keep it at the same time.
Whether a son holds the ground concerning sexual purity displays his character and his ability to provide security for his future spouse. The Shulamite, in the Song of Solomon, is a great example. Maintaining her purity led to her ability to provide contentment for her husband (Song of Solomon 8: 10).
II. The Consequences of Sexual Sin (5:3-6)
If the simple cannot see the consequences of his sin, his father will try to paint the picture as vivid as he can. The appeal of the temptress is in her words. They drip sweetness and smoothness. Her desire seeks illicit pleasure or wealth. A flattering mouth works ruin (26:28) and the naive swallow her words hook, line, and sinker. Her appeal, further described in 7:13-14, conceals the trap.
The temptress herself is deceived. "She gives no thought to her ways" and has no idea how unstable her life really is. She is the other victim. She is unable to create a healthy relationship. Her sexual drive overrides other relationship concerns and thought of potential consequences. She is on a path toward judgment. The path may be crooked, but she is headed straight to hell "Death" is more than hyperbole for a ruined life. It is also physical and spiritual death.
What are the consequences to the simple if he gets involved? There is bitterness. He blames her for her deception. He blames God for a lost relationship and any consequences of judgment. He blames himself for being fooled. The pain comes like a double-edged sword, inflicting twice the injury.
III. The Father's Restated Warning (5:7-8)
One solution for temptation is distance. Until character and discipline is developed in the life of the youth, he must give temptation a wide berth. "Keep far..." and "Don't go near..." are moral margins meant to secure safety for the son.
IV. Seduction's End (5:9-14)
The father now begins to enumerate the things the son will lose. He will mourn the loss of his youth, his years of strength, all wasted in the pursuit of selfish ends. He pictures his son as sitting back and realizing how much is gone: Time, Strength, Wealth, and Health. The years which were precisely given by God to set the economic foundation for his family have passed and all of the profit has gone to another quarter. The loss of health is not only the passage of time but the consequences of sin. While it includes the normal wear and tear of time, it also includes such things as sexually transmitted diseases.
The loss will be a source of tremendous regret. "You will groan" is a deep, emotional, elemental, animal cry of anguish and pain. Health, wealth, and time have passed and there is no recovery. He regrets he did not follow wisdom early. He had hated its confines. His disobedience has now confined him. His decisions have now led him to the brink of utter public disgrace and complete ruin,
Following the sexual liberation of our society has led
our whole society to incredible judgment. Divorce has torn apart half our
families, even in the church. Children bear the brunt 
of the parent's freedom as they
are raised without a parent or a good model of a family or marriage
relationship. They make the same mistakes because they know nothing else. Our
sexual sins are never private.
V. The Proper Expression of Sexual Pleasure
The wise father now begins to explain the true purposes of sexual desire and how it can be properly expressed. He has shown what to avoid. Now he explains the Creator's intentions in both implicit and explicit language. He uses the hidden language of metaphor so that the son realizes that he is talking about a personal intimate issue that is designed to be a hidden, particular joy between a husband and a wife. He is explicit because he wants to be clear. Sometimes to train a fool you have to use a 2’x4’.
The metaphor of water is chosen because water satisfies desire, it quenches thirst. Solomon admonishes his son to be exclusive in his sexual relationship. Sex needs the boundaries of marriage to produce a depth of intimacy, trust, and security that could not be produced otherwise. His pleasure will come from the relationship itself. His wife will be more than a tool to convey pleasure. She will embody the joy, passion, and satisfaction that God has designed to be a part of a stable, exclusive relationship.
Why, the father asks, would he want to share that with another? Love and friendship must anchor that pleasure so that joy comes from the whole relationship. A promiscuous relationship cannot achieve the depth of intimacy that brings contentment, but it divides that passion and gives it to others. Sharing passion results in sharing children. I remember working for a propane company once. My boss introduced me to a man with the words, "He's got children all over this town." What a crushing tragedy, now and for the next generations!
I have watched parents look on helplessly as strangers, new wives or lovers, begin to impact their children. They take pen in hand to write another story on the children never intended by the original parent. The children become controlled by fear because security is lost each time a new person moves into a relationship with them. Fear is a strange thing. When fear rises in a child's life, his ability to learn decreases. The more fears that stack up in his life, the more obstacles he has to success.
Blessing, Joy, Satisfaction, and Captivation are all meant to be the fruit of an exclusive
sexual relationship. Pleasure is the design of God. Song of Solomon pictures God as the best man waiting outside the marriage chamber to announce with joy its consummation. "Eat, O friends, and drink; drink your fill, O lovers" (Song of Solomon 5: l). It is His design for mankind's benefit, but only when experienced within the strictures of wisdom. Satisfaction comes from passion in the context of an exclusive relationship that has grown in depth, in trust, and in friendship.
Post-Modern life ruins all this. Woman is objectified in the relationship. She loses her personhood and her ability to bring pleasure depends on her youth and her looks. She competes with movie stars and glossy print pictures that never have a bad day. Cosmetic surgery, clothing, lingerie, and Procter and Gamble's new female sexual desire patch are all designed to help her put her best foot forward in the relationship. No one realizes that brief liaisons give no time for the kind of intimacy that requires a lifelong bond with the "wife of your youth."
VI. Two Kinds of Justice
The eyes of God are a curious thing. Solomon reminds his son that nothing escapes God's view. Nothing is truly private or hidden. God rejoices in the proper use of His gifts. He examines with an eye towards judgment the deeds of wayward men. The corruption of God's gifts is done in full view of God Himself. God is shown as actively opposing that corruption.
Judgment also comes as the natural consequences of sin. Fools die because of their own great folly. Science and medicine race to forestall the inevitable. Health, wealth, time, and strength are all washed away in a sea of regret.
Earlier, we mentioned that the church has a responsibility to hold up a God-honoring view of sex so that our children have the opportunity to get it right. The church also has a responsibility to show compassion and to help repair the damage of a disobedient lifestyle.
Everywhere are the marks of Satan's handiwork. Each situation has a name, a face, a past, and a future. George is a trucker who has left behind three marriages and three children who will be raised without him. He cries over consequences and continues to sin. Brittany has had three abortions and can point out the men in the church she has slept with. She is depressed and struggles to get out of bed in the morning. She wants to get married and find rest for her heart, but she is addicted to something else altogether. Justin loves God and wants to serve him as a teacher but struggles with feelings of homosexuality and loneliness. Where in our sexually charged society is the power to stop? Real people, real pain. May God show them mercy and grace through us.
